Tonight the hymn "My Hope is Built on Nothing Less" popped into my head.
As i sang and read the lyrics i was on the edge of tears...
"My hope is built on nothing less
Than Jesus' blood and righteousness
I dare not trust the sweetest frame
But wholly lean on Jesus' name
When darkness veils His lovely face
I rest on His unchanging grace
In every high and stormy gale
My anchor holds within the veil
His Oath, His Covenant, His blood
Support me in the whelming flood
When every earthly prop gives way
He then is all my Hope and Stay
When he shall come with trumpet sound
Oh, may i then in Him be found
Clothed in his righteousness alone
Faultless to stand before the throne
-On Christ the solid rock i stand
All other ground is sinking sand
All other ground is sinking sand
I had an overwhelming Sunday night at work. I was faced with many responsibilities that i've never had to deal with before and i was so overwhelmed by the end of my shift i couldn't go home and go to sleep (even though it was past 1am)
I was so overwhelmed by everything that had happened...So after dropping Aaron off at work, early the next morning, i pulled in the driveway, turned off the car and just sat in the silence and cried a little.
With everything that had happened i felt like i needed someone to talk to...to let everything out and "debrief." i just needed to lay everything out on the table of what had gone on and figure out if i was still the right person for this job or if i was too young and under qualified to actually handle it. (And God listened)
I got a call from my supervisor Monday afternoon, she said i handled everything really well, she was proud of me and i did a good job. She laughed that i went through such a dramatic evening, but was glad, in a way, that things happened because it gave me some good experiences. Im really glad she thought i did good because i was on the verge of quitting. I honestly didn't think i did a good job because i had to call her over and over that whole night as things kept getting crazier and crazier.
I was very thankful to know that i have a whole week off before going back to work this weekend. I definitely think i needed it. All day, Monday, and a bit of today i've continued to go over the events of my Sunday night and i continue to find more and more glimpses of God being right in the midst of each moment that night. (I love it when that happens)
SO, TONIGHT this song came to mind. And it's so touching and it's truly the song of my heart, and the theme song of my life right now!
"I dare not trust the sweetest frame, but WHOLLY lean on JESUS' NAME"
"In every high and stormy gale My anchor holds within the veil"
"His Oath, His Covenant, His blood Support me in the whelming flood, When every earthly prop gives way, He then is all my Hope and Stay"
Looking back on Sunday night at work, i barely had time to stop for a moment and think about all the things going on at the time, but i can see how God was there for me. He kept me calm, He gave me the strength i needed to get through the bombardment of issues that happened and He gave me a peace throughout everything. I didn't even realize it at the time, but looking back i can see that the only way i made it through all that happened was through Him!
I have a heavy heart for a client right now, and although i can't say what's going on with her because of the confidentiality rules, all i can ask is that people pray for her. I never had a desire to go out of my way to talk to this one girl i only was there when she came to me first and needed something i never went out of my way to talk to her. But when she needed something Sunday night and her world seemed to be crashing down, i was the one that had to help her. I was the one that God made sure was on that shift to deal with what happened.
I don't know how, or why, but i do know that right now, this new job of mine is my mission field. And i definitely need to get prayed up because i can already see the obstacles that will be in my way if i don't have the full armor of God on each time i walk into that building. Please pray for that client. And for me to have the words to say, the actions to reflect God and the strength to do this work.
"Give thanks to the Lord for He is good, His love endures forever." -1 Chronicles 16:34
